A bookaversary rant from Webrid

Howdy, C&G readers! Anne E. Johnson here, hoping to calm down a raging Yeril who’s currently trashing my apartment. He heard me mention that June 19, 2013, is the first anniversary of Green Light Delivery, Book 1 of the Webrid Chronicles. Let’s just say that it did not pull up a lot of happy memories for him, and the imminent release of Book 2, Blue Diamond Delivery, is no more calming a prospect. I thought you might find it grimly amusing to listen in:



They stuck a thing in my head, man. Some laser thing. You shoulda seen it. The headache! Arr, when I think about it I can still feel it stuck in there. And I kept seein’ green the whole time. It made me sick. Why’d you even hafta bring that up?

Don’t you get all “don’t get so upset” with me, woman! I’m tellin’ ya, the whole thing was torture, and it seemed like it was never gonna end.

Some robot sticks the laser thing in my skull, and I’m all freaked out, right? I figure I should try to relax, go on vacation over on the planet Cheed, try to forget about it. And what happens? Gangsters happen, is what happens. I get kidnapped. I think I mighta got kidnapped a coupla times. Maybe even three. Waddya mean, why don’t I remember? Maybe ’cause I had a green laser stuck in my head!

And now this business with the blue diamond. There’s quakes on all the planets, and a government doofus with big, flappy nostrils tells me I’m the only guy can fix things. Seriously? I gotta go through more crap? How come the world can’t just leave me alone? My buddies Zatell and Stravin don’t seem to mind, so I vote they just take care of all this time-wastin’ world-savin’ without me. Leave ol’ Webrid at home to watch Entra-lady porn and get wasted.

Oh, I’m gonna need to use yer TV. And yer couch.

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